It is no secret that ending a marriage can be messy. In many cases, it can be downright nasty, with acrimony and contentiousness that can linger for many years after the divorce is finalized. Of course, there is no requirement that your divorce must follow such a path. The law in Illinois, in fact, explicitly encourages just the opposite. A cooperative, negotiated divorce is almost always preferable to a fiercely litigated dissolution, and can help pave the way for a more civil post-divorce relationship between you and your ex-spouse.
Cooperation Encourages Compliance
If you were to step back and objectively assess yourself, are you likely to do something just because you were told to do it? (i.e. a court's decision after a trial) While you may be able to follow orders, you are probably much more willing to do so if you had a role in creating them. An amicable divorce offers the opportunity for you and your spouse to do just that. Together, you can create a workable agreement that addresses whatever concerns each of you may have. Long-term compliance may be significantly improved if you both feel that you were an important part of the settlement.
Setting a Good Example
As challenging as it may be to work in close collaboration with your soon-to-be ex-spouse, consider how your children may be affected by the divorce process. Of course, you and your spouse will have difficult personal issues to work through, but your children can learn a great deal about resolving differences in a cooperative and civil manner. It is important for your children to know that disagreement is possible in a manner that still maintains civility and respect for the other party. Your commitment to cooperation can also lead to your children being more willing to adapt to the upcoming changes, as they start to share your positive outlook.
Foundation for the Future
Depending on your circumstances, your ex-spouse could remain a part of your life for many years to come, especially if you are about to become co-parents. Your divorce is likely to set the tone for your new relationship with your former partner. A drawn-out, hotly contested divorce can leave you angry and bitter, making communication and cooperation tough. Conversely, an amicable divorce agreement can lay the groundwork for future compromise and a willingness to work together. You will still have your share of challenges and disagreements, but your overall situation is likely to be much better.
Let Us Help You
While you may have some idea of what your ideal divorce agreement looks like, an experienced Kane County family law attorney can help you address all of the necessary details. Call 630-377-7770 to schedule your free initial consultation at Bochte, Kuzniar & Navigato, P.C., today. Our knowledgeable team is ready to assist you in negotiating a divorce settlement that protects your rights and those of your children.